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WHEN young mum Emma Dawson was told her baby Will had septo-optic dysplasia – the same condition as Katie Price’s son Harvey – she struggled to cope. Emma and new husband Neil talk to KAREN WILSON about the challenges they faced – and why they’re now happier than ever.

HAVING a child with special needs will test the mettle of any parent, but when Emma Dawson gave birth to her first child at just 21 she was bewildered by all the doctors' talk of abnormal movements, seizures and learning disabilities.

Emma's son Will, now 13, was born with septo-optic dysplasia - a rare condition that
affects one in 10,000. This means his pituitary gland doesn't work properly, he's on hormone
therapy, is blind and has epilepsy, learning difficulties and autism.

"It was really scary," says Emma, 33, from Normanby, Middlesbrough. "We were told this
young lad will have a life in and out of hospital.
I was imagining my life to be over."

On the day Will was due to go home after several months in intensive care, Emma was
given the devastating news he was blind. "It just didn't sink in," says Emma. "I wasn't worried or
upset. I didn't cry. I was just shocked. I thought they must be wrong."
At home, Emma admits she was "on another planet". "It was like it was happening to someone else," she says. "Being so young I thought it would all be OK and someone would fix it. I thought the doctors will send someone round, but nobody came. Life just started to kick in then."

Gradually, Emma realised she would have to adapt to Will's needs. "I remember feeding him
and thinking, you can't see, this bottle is just coming and plonking in your mouth," she says.
"So I started stroking his face as a warning."

Feeling isolated, Emma went back to work in finance at Orange while her mam looked after
Will.
"I wasn't really being the best mam," she admits.
"My mam was doing a lot for me. It was
a coping mechanism. I know that now."

She also missed appointments with health visitors and gave support networks a wide
berth.
"They were trying to show me how to motivate and play with Will, to let him know there's a
world outside his immediate body, but I didn't want to be there," she says.

"At a coffee morning for parents of children with special needs I was looking around the
room thinking - oh my God, my kid won't look like that. He won't have funny eyes like them."
As Will got older, it became apparent he had other problems too. He was slow with toilet
training and feeding, displayed repetitive behaviour and wasn't developing language properly.
Struggling in a mainstream school, he was kept back in reception class for three years and, at
five, he was diagnosed with autism. "All the behaviours were going under the radar because
I was just looking at the visual impairment," says Emma.

After taking redundancy from Orange, Emma realised things had to change - and turned feisty.
"I needed to pull my family life back and start taking control," she says. "I started developing
my confidence, getting support from other parents and learning about the system."

After working for Scope, Emma got a job at The Main Project, which helps parents of
children with autism on Teesside. And although she's since split from Will's dad Mick, he still
plays a major part in Will's life.

There are many challenges looking after Will - he has no concept of danger and the front door
has to be locked to stop him darting off - but it's clear Emma adores her son.
"He's a really interesting little boy, but so unexplainable sometimes," she says. "He's
formed our whole family. You never hear people talking about how fab it can be."

She's also found new happiness with Neil, 32, a customer service team manager at Sage,
Newcastle, who she married last November. The pair met three years ago through Facebook
dating and Neil remembers scrolling through photos of Emma with Will on her knee.

"It was quite clear that Will did have a need and a difficulty but it didn't phase me one little
bit," he says. "I just thought, she's got a son. He looks cool."

Although Neil had done some volunteering with special needs children before, he knew the
first meeting with Will would be an important day for Emma.

"I was overly cautious with him, almost like he was made of glass," he remembers. "Sitting next
to him at the dining table, he was quite slouched on the chair and I was fearful he was going to fall off. But Emma was really cool and calm, and said that's just how he is. He does things in his own way."

Now Neil and Will are very close, and he loves being a step-dad. "It sounds really corny, but it's
totally changed my life," he says. "Before I met Emma I was living the bachelor lifestyle. I had a
house on Front Street in Tynemouth, I had a really good job and my life was totally different.

"I know Will's technically not my son but I class him as that in everything that we do. When we do things, we do things in a way that makes Will happy."

It's been a big learning curve for Neil, who now knows to offer Will choices rather than asking
what he wants, and to stick to a regular diary of activities. "He loves his food and usually it's the
key calming measure," he laughs.

As Will is very sensitive to movement, he often comes downstairs with Neil when he gets up for
work at 5.30am. And, despite his autism, he shows affection when he wants something. "If
Emma and I are talking and he wants us to be quiet, he'll come up and kiss Emma," says Neil.

"But if you went up and gave him a cuddle he wouldn't necessarily enjoy it. It has to be on his
terms."

Thankfully, unlike Peter Andre and Harvey's dad Dwight Yorke, Neil gets on very well with
Emma's ex Mick.

"With other couples that might be a significant problem, but Mick and I have a really good
relationship," he says. "Mick's a great guy and I can see why him and Emma were together. I
think Mick's pleased that Emma's got someone like me who's adapted to the situation quite
well."

Now Emma is almost three months pregnant and Neil is over the moon. "It hasn't sunk in one
little bit," he says. "It's what I've always wanted and it's great that it's with Emma and the
extended family. Will knows the situation and he accepts and understands what's happening."

Emma adds: "From the word go, Neil's always loved being around Will. He's picked it up
without any coaching and is a real natural. Will's really lucky because he has two fab dads."